The Chocolate Cherry and Small Boobs

I have had several  requests to post the recipe for this pattern in my blog.  I had a request to also create a video showing how to tie the Carp Carrot along with the Chocolate Cherry.  I don't when  I will be able to do that but it is on my radar.   Here are some thoughts on this pattern along with how to tie it.

Let me begin by saying please that I can tie complicated flies; I enjoy tying complicated flies.  I particularly enjoy tying flies that catch fish.  When a complicated fly catches fish that's great; I savor tying it.  When a simple fly catches fish that's great too; I savor tying it.

I have tried a large variety of specific flies and types of patterns for Carp.  Some of those flies are complicated and some are simple.  Some don't work at all, some work moderately well, and some are consistent producers.

The thing about simple flies is that there is a certain degree of mistrust of them.  Almost as if, "it couldn't be that good if it ain't hard to tie."

This is a blog, I'm not writing to sell subscriptions; I'm writing because I enjoy it and because a few people seem to enjoy reading it.  That said, I am going to make a jump here.  I have written some things that are me playing around but I am serious about this next thing.  It might seem like am wandering but I'm really not.

If you are a heterosexual man and if you see a woman with big boobs, a lot of makeup, and a magazine kind of face, what would you think?  In particular, what would you think if she was standing next to a small breasted woman, with no makeup, and a face?   Well, what would you think?  If you could stare at them without being noticed who would you stare at?   Starin' ain't choosin' though now is it?  If you had a choice of being able to talk to one of them  who would you choose?  Why?  Kinda get you goin' a little to stare at them big boobs?  Maybe in your life you never had that choice and by that I mean you never had the opportunity to choose the perfect woman.   I mean the perfect woman with small boobs and little to no make up.  Did you think I meant you never had the opportunity to choose the big boobs?  HA!  I definitely did not!  There is plenty of opportunity to make that choice.  If you get the chance to make the choice, choose the small breasted woman with no makeup.  Yes, I am serious.   I'm tellin' you she'll surprise you over and over and over.  She's the best.

Simple flies are like small boobs; they're more erotic, they're the best.  I certainly wanted to get your attention, but again, yes I am serious, about the boobs and the flies.

The Chocolate Cherry and the Carp Carrot have been for me extremely effective Carp patterns; they are both simple flies.  If the Carrot and the Cherry were in a bin next to a "fly with big boobs" it is so easy to dismiss them.  You know, kind of like, "There's just not enough there..."  What can I say, some things take time to understand and appreciate.





 The Chocolate Cherry:

Thread:  Black
Hook:  Tiemco 5262 sizes 8 and 10
Weight:  Dumbbell eyes, sizes 1/8 and 5/32
Tail:  White round rubber
Body:  Medium brown chenille, size small or even fine
Hackle:  Grizzly saddle hackle dyed red.

A few other things about this fly:

I originally tied the fly without the rubber tail.  I almost always include the tail now.

The tail actually is two strands of the white rubber; the first one is just blocking the second one in the picture.  I cut one piece, fold it over to make it even, and then tie down over the fold.

The hackle is wrapped a good number of times so the color really shows up.  The fly ends up looking more red than brown.  The grizzly saddle hackle has become very difficult to find in shops.  Women are wearing the feathers in their hair.  Good grief...

Fishing the Chocolate Cherry:

I have not had as good of luck dropping this fly as I have had dropping the Carp Carrot, a Rubber Leg Hare's Ear or the SJW.  I don't have slightest idea why.  I have had the best results casting and stripping this fly onto the Carp's dinner plate.  I have also observed that a Carp cruising in the water column, as opposed to on the bottom, is more likely to pick this fly up than the Carrot and way more likely to pick it up than the SJW.  Again, I don't have any idea why.

This fly has become one of my "go to patterns".

Taking Carp for Granted

In the UK a "day ticket" water is private water where the angler pays to fish for the day.  A "syndicate" lake is where the angler buys a yearly membership.

Everywhere I fish for Carp is public water.  I plan to fish for Carp in three states this year.  I would pay if it was required but I don't have to as all of the water is public.

Today I received the following email from Bobby, a Carp angler in the UK:

Hi I am a carp fisherman from the uk and my sister inlaw lives in north wales Pennsylvania. I have been to visit her on several occasions and have been trying to find a day ticket water to use whilst on holiday if you could please help in anyway possible could you please email me thank you for your help.


I am becoming increasingly aware just how damn fortunate we are to be able to fish for Carp here in the United States. For FREE, for bloody FREE!!


  

Lessons from the Carp Lodge: Episode #3 is live

Episode #3 of Lessons from the Carp Lodge has been posted on YouTube.

Transitioning out of the close quarter, early season fishing for Carp seems to bring a problem for me every year. This episode shows the problem and the solutions.

This episode demonstrates when to set the hook by showing a Carp clearly moving to eat a real bug and then moving to eat the fake. I personally really like this particular segment because you can clearly see the fish make a decided move to snatch up a meal and do exactly the same thing to pick up the Chocolate Cherry.  No red arrows are needed at all.

You will see a Mirror Carp decide that I am ugly.  What can I say?...

Casting and stripping are the techniques used to get the fly on the Carp's dinner plate in this episode.

At the end of one of the narrative sections it looks like I don't know what to do next or like I forgot to get up.  That seems to happen to me more and more but as I take these videos I sit there a couple seconds at the beginning and the end so that if I add a transition it doesn't interrupt the narration.  I just sit there for a couple seconds and then get up and walk off camera.  That's my fly tying bench you will see.

You will also see me look down at me knee a couple times like I lost something or like I was falling asleep listening to myself.  I had a note card on my knee reminding me what part is next.  I just needed a quick prompt.

I received two emails asking about my fly, the Chocolate Cherry.  There is brief clip showing a whole "box of Chocolate Cherries".

Enjoy.

My Farting: An Outside Expert's Opinion

Very recently I made a blog post titled A Tale of Three Farts.  It was from a magazine article I published a few years ago. I said that the introduction may have been slightly exaggerated but all of the rest of the content was accurate and true.  The article speaks to how sensitive Carp are to noises.

This past Tuesday I had a colonoscopy.  At my age, 61,  this kind of screening is a good thing.  Preventive medicine you know.  I had my first one when I was 50.  Actually I was scheduled to have only a flexible sigmoidoscopy.  For a colonoscopy they insert the camera 4.5 feet.  Seriously.  For a flex sig I was told they only insert the camera about 1/3 of that distance.  I hate the anesthesia/sedative because it takes me a long time to wake up and  I am groggy all day so I elected to have the procedure without the sedative.  After the doc had reached the scheduled distance he asked me how I was doing.  I told him that this really wasn't fun at all.  He asked if he could go a little farther.  I told him, "Yes".  He asked me that several more times and eventually I had a colonoscopy without the sedative.  I decided that the next time I had this procedure I would have the sedative because like I said it just wasn't fun at all.  

To prepare for a colonoscopy you can't eat any solid food for about 36 hours.  You can eat Jello and clear liquid.  Oh, and one more thing.  You take a diuretic in the morning and another one in the afternoon.  Let me tell you, by the evening you have nothing left to give; I mean NOTHING.  I should mention that you get kind of dehydrated.  

I had another colonoscopy when I was 55 and my third one this week.  When they do the procedure they blow oxygen in your colon so they can see better.   They watch on a color monitor and give your pictures when you are finished.  Again, seriously.  I found myself thinking the first time that it was like Splash Mountain at Disneyland where they take your picture as you come down the last drop and then they offer it to you for $20 dollars or whatever it is.  At least with the colonoscopy they don't show you the pictures and then offer them to you for an extra charge.  Its' good to know the pictures are part of the package.  

After the procedure is finished they wheel you out into recovery.  You have to have someone drive you home.  Katy was waiting in recovery for me to wake up.  When you report for the procedure you are hungry and thirsty.  Remember I hadn't eaten for 36 hours and I had defecated (crapped) more than I thought was remotely possible even though this was my third time having the procedure.   

When you wake up the nurse has you roll over into the "farting position".  Again, I am serious.  Okay, I know that doesn't sound dignified to have the nurse say to you, "Okay, its time to get into the farting position."  But what is she going to say, "Its time to roll over so you can expel some rectal gas."  That would be ridiculous.  I suppose I could say, "Hey, you guys put oxygen in my colon and now I feel kind of bloated."  And then the nurse could say, "Yeah, so what...l blow it out your ass!"  Okay that wouldn't be good either.  So I think the middle ground is the best.  "It's time to roll over into the farting position" probably makes the most sense.  

What is the "farting position" you might be asking.  From experience I can tell you that they have you roll over on your left side.  You extend your left leg straight out and then pull your right knee up towards your chest.  I have to tell you it works.  I knew the routine so I got into farting position fairly quickly.  I was thirsty as heck and they won't give you water until you fart a few times.  

The nurse said, "Okay, good, you are in position.  Now go ahead and fart."  (You young readers will think I am making this up but I'm not.  You just wait.)  Then the nurse said, "I'll be right back; you go ahead and fart."  She went over to check on another patient.  Well I had two rounds chambered so I did what I was instructed to do.  And a damn fine job I did!  She came back and asked me if I had farted.  I said, "Yes, twice."  She said, "Was that you?"  I said, "Yes."  She said, "Can you do it again?"  I said, "Sure," and I proceeded to rip off three more particularly robust ones. She said, "Wow, you're good at this."  I looked at Katy and she just shook her head.  What was she going to say?  

I asked the nurse how many procedures they do in a day.  She said they usually do 10 in the morning and 10 in the afternoon.  Let's say the nurse only works one day a week.  That would be 20 per week and 80 per month.  Let's say she takes vacation.  That still means she rolls over 900 people into farting position per year.  And what if she does this a couple days a week?  Let's just stick with one day a week.  If she has just 5 or 6 years of experience she has heard somewhere in the vicinity of 5,000 people fart on command.  Let's say she has 10 or 15 years experience.  Dear God, how many people has she heard fart?  

I think it is safe to say that even conservatively that nurse has heard 5,000 different people fart on command; heck she may have heard 10 or 15 thousand.  I think that qualifies her as an farting expert of sorts.  And to think, she told me, "Wow, you're good at this."  It sort of makes me feel warm all over.  

Well, I think it is time to revise my commentary on my blog post, "A Tale of Three Farts."  The narrative is all true but I said the introduction was possibly slightly exaggerated.  Given the expert opinion rendered on my farting this past Tuesday I am now going to have to say now the whole darn thing is totally true.

I should add, no wonder the Carp swam away.   

Episode #3 is Coming Soon

I had hoped to have episode #3 of Lessons from the Carp Lodge published this week.  I didn't make it.  It is almost finished now.  I'm planning to finish it up, render it this weekend, and the post it to YouTube.  Episode #3 focuses on the transition from early season, close quarter fishing to some distance casting.  It shows some of the problems, well one anyway, that I have when I make the transition.  There is no pitching, plopping, or dropping in this episode.  It is only casting and stripping.  There is also some discussion of when to set the hook and video demonstrating it.  One segment has a Carp making a decided move to a real bug and then doing the exact same thing for the fake.  The Carp in this episode fall for the Chocolate Cherry.  Somewhere, I have a picture of a box of Chocolate Cherries; alas I am still looking for it.  I wanted to put it in the video. Episode #3 is  almost ready.

Questions about your Carp fishing

The more correspondence I have with Carp anglers across the country the more curious and fascinated I am with where people Carp fish and how they access Carp.  To a certain extent we all have some things in common.  Carp behaviors and characteristics seem to be fairly consistent.  Strategies and techniques that work are effective many places.  Increasingly I realize that some of us are fishing water that is quite different and we are accessing Carp in many different ways.

Often I wade shallow water when I fish for Carp but I also fish from my Zodiac a good deal.  I'm not using the Zodiac for transportation to get to the next spot where I will be wading.  When I am in the Zodiac I am fishing from the Zodiac the entire day.  Some years ago I published a magazine article about the advantages and disadvantages of fishing from Zodiac versus wading.

So here are my questions.  I'm not asking for GPS coordinates by any means; you don't even have to name the water you fish.  

1.  If you are in the United States what State you live in and if you are not from the U. S.  what country you live in?

2.  Do you fish moving water or still water or both?

3.  Is the water you fish typically clear, slightly off color, or just plain brown?

4.  What is the bottom like?  Is it muddy and dangerous to wade?  Is it firm mud, sand, pebbles, cobbles, or jagged rocks?

5.  Are there sometimes or typically a lot of weeds where you fish?

6.  Do you fish from shore?

7.  Do you fish from anything that floats?  An aluminum boat, an inflatable boat, a kayak, a canoe, a pontoon boat, a kickboat, or a float tube?  

8.  If you fish from something that floats how do you move around?  Gas motor, electric motor, oars, paddles, fins, push pole?

9.  If you use an anchor how do you manage it?

10.  Is there anyone out there who does both?  By that I mean that you wade and fish from something that floats.

Thanks.

    

A Tale of Three Farts

I published this magazine article about 5 years ago.  Katy and I have been married 34 years now.  In the article I reference having been married 29 years.  The first paragraph is possibly slightly exaggerated but not that much.  (if at all)  The rest happened exactly as I described it.

I am posting this article now in response to the comments and discussion in this post concerning noise and putting Carp "on alert" or just plain scaring them off.  

Rereading this and rereading my fishing journal entries from 6 to 8 years ago I am reminded how darn important it is to do everything I can to keep from putting Carp on alert.  

The Tale           

In order to tell this tale I must first make a disclosure.  You might feel sorry for me, you might be embarrassed for me, you might identify completely, or you might be envious.  Who knows?  Maybe it’s a confession, maybe I’m bragging, I don’t know.  Either way, it needs to be said, so here it is, I’m good at farting.  Actually, I’m quite good at it.    There it is; I said it.  I know you Good Ol’ Boys in the South know exactly what I’m talking about.  I know y'all do!  You boys in the Midwest are down with this skill also; yeah, you betcha.  All you boys out here in the West get the picture.  I’m a little concerned though about some of you blue bloods in the Northeast.  With your dignified little putt putts, I bet you’re wondering what it means to be good at farting and how one gets to be good at this skill.  Without going in to too much detail let’s just agree that in no particular order the measures of “good” are: duration, sound volume, and frequency.  Plain and simply I excel at all three measures.  I’m good at farting and I enjoy it.  I don’t know how other people get good at this but I know how I got good at it.  Practice, practice, practice, that’s the key.  I have years of enthusiastic and frequent practice behind me so to speak.  So with the fact that I am good at farting established let us proceed with our tale.

         

While stalking Carp I sometimes wade the flats and I sometimes fish from a small Zodiac.  The Zodiac is only 8 ½ feet long.  That measurement is for the external length.  The interior space is much less because of the diameter of the tubes and because the transom is over a foot from the end of the tubes.  The Zodiac is a marvelous platform from which to fish but it does have some noticeable limitations compared to wading.  The floor in the Zodiac is made of 3/8 inch plywood with aluminum grooves.  I am able to stand in the boat and stalk fish.  While standing to cast, one of my shins is often touching one of the tubes of the boat.  When I change positions from sitting to standing or visa versa the boards and PVC tubes creak.  The boat will even creak if I just shift my weight from one foot to another.  This can be very annoying.  Normally it wouldn’t seem like much to me, except that is, when I’m Carp fishing.  Those darn Carp seem to be hyper sensitive to the smallest little noise. 

On a warm, July day in 2004 I was fishing from my Zodiac.  The eastern Washington wind, which often howls, was almost non existent.  The water was clear, the sky was blue; amongst the sunbathing and cruising Carp there were feeding fish.  I had hooked and released some fish; it was shaping up to be a marvelous day.  By day’s end several more fish had been deceived by feathers and fur.  Lots of fish to cast to, some willing ones amongst my targets, and perfect conditions, all made for a peak experience.  For whatever reason there are days when my confidence in my own casting goes up or down.  Some days I’m sure I’m going to place the fly in the desired spot.  Other days I just don’t have it.  This particular day, my confidence was running high.  I had made some “money” casts and got some hookups.  There was an occasional breeze which sometimes helped move me into position to make a cast but sometimes it moved me out of position.  A nice fish moved in to the swim I was working.  He began tailing immediately.  I suppose foreshadowing; there was a gentle puff of wind which moved me slightly closer to my quarry.  I was false casting, picturing a perfect cast.  Even before I delivered the line I could see the subtle take in my mind’s eye and feel the first explosive run.  I was making my last back cast setting up for my perfect delivery when suddenly there was a noise.  This was no gentle puff of wind; alas, I had farted.  Keep in mind I’m quite good at it but also keep in mind please that those darn fish are spooked by even the slightest little noise.  The fish bolted immediately.  I have seen Carp bolt for some easy to explain reasons and at times for no apparent reason at all.  I assumed that it was only coincidence that this fish bolted just as I made some sound.  I mean, well, yes, I’m good at it, but while I thought it was funny, there was no way I could have made enough noise for that fish to hear.  Good grief he was 35-40 feet away.  I laughed to myself about it several times and laughed when I recounted the story to others, including my very patient wife.

A year later, almost to the day, I was back on the same water.  Again, I was in my Zodiac.  There were some wispy clouds overhead, the kind that look like someone found a few fat, puffy ones and tried to sweep them away leaving track marks in the sky.  There was some wind, enough that it made stalking more difficult, but not enough to make casting impossible.  The water was cloudy.  It was still clear enough for me to see tailing fish but because the surface was disturbed from the wind the fish were a good deal more challenging to spot from a distance.  Because the wind was moving the boat I got only one cast at an individual fish as I came into range unless I anchored.  I had fished three hours and had released only one fish.  I wasn’t getting many casts to good targets.  When I did cast, if I wasn’t anchored, I was fighting the drift of the boat.  The line would belly very quickly; if I mended it I spooked the fish.  If I was anchored, the boat was swinging on the anchor.  Again, certainly not impossible conditions, but not ideal either. 

I had moved upwind again and was beginning to drift down the lake.  There were some tailing fish but by the time I saw them I was usually too close.  The wind subsided as if it had been running up hill and needed to take a rest.  The surface of the lake calmed and just like that a tailing fish came into view.  He was off to my side so rather than move my feet and risk making noise I turned my upper body to make my cast.  Both the Carp and I were fully engrossed; he looking for hapless critters in the mud, me trying to trick him with my fake.  I had made just two false casts and was delivering the line.  Just as I let go of the line with my left hand I let go with something else.  And yes, it was a good one.  Just before the line landed on the water the fish bolted and left me staring at a cloud of mud.  I hadn’t moved my feet, the floor boards hadn’t creaked: it just had to be a coincidence; that fish just couldn’t have heard my rumblings.  Rested, the wind found its breath; with renewed energy it started blowing.  I dropped anchor and as I did so another cloud of mud appeared not far from me.  I had spooked yet another fish.  I sat down and grumbled.  It wasn’t shaping up to be a marvelous day at all.  In fact the single fish I had already released would end up being my only one for the day. 

The previous year I thought that it was funny when I farted and a fish bolted.  It was easier to make jokes about it because I had a great day and because I thought it was humorous coincidence.  Now I actually started to wonder.  Could those fish actually hear or sense a fart?  Surely they couldn’t.  Or could they?  I thought something else made those fish take off, possibly a signal from a shoal mate, maybe seeing my funny looking face as they looked up through the water, maybe the sight of the boat, and maybe the moving shadow made by the fly line just before it hit the water.  It just had to be one of these things. 

The boat is in obvious contact with the water so any sound from the boat is easily transmitted.  My feet are always touching the floor boards and my leg is often touching the side of the boat so any sound from me is easily transmitted to the boat and so on.  I started to take my own joke more seriously so I read and reread things I had studied the past few years.  In several sources I was reminded that Carp have elaborate sensory systems which enable them to hear better than most fish and to detect subtle changes in their environment.  They have the traditional lateral line along with internal Carp ears of sorts.  If that’s not enough, quoting from the Dictionary of Ichthyology, “The Weberian apparatus is four bones and associated tissues connecting the gas bladder to the inner ear and conveying pressure changes and sound.”  Now wait a minute, a lateral line and internal Carp ears seem fine but not this Weberian thing.  That’s just not fair.  I think it makes the darn Carp too smart for its own good.  The kidding aside I really was starting to believe a Carp could be scared by a good fart. 

I headed to the same lake about 10 days later. While driving over and while setting up my gear I had again been wondering about, and actually marveling at, just how sensitive Carp are to changes in any part of their environment, particularly to sound. It was a calm day, the sky was absolutely clear; the water was only slightly off color.  I could spot tailing fish from quite a distance.  My sense of anticipation was very high as I pulled out from shore.  I was planning to fish a new Carp pattern.  I had tied two dozen of them in couple different sizes.  After only a short time out on the water a slow cruising fish stopped for what looked like a serious breakfast.  He was about 35-40 feet from me. He was perpendicular to my line of sight.  I had loosely, coiled line hanging from my left hand, the fly was pinched between my left thumb and fore finger, rod in hand I was perfectly poised to make a money cast.  Suddenly I felt the urge, so to speak, to perform a piscatorial assessment.  I had to act decisively to make sure that no other variables intruded.  I had to decide if I was willing to forego casting to this wonderful fish in order to have my question answered.  I farted.  The answer to the assessment was immediate; the fish made a hurried escape. 

Please know that each of the three experiences actually happened just as I described.  The results were also just as I described.  Being serious, the experiences gave me cause to pay much closer attention to the noise I make when stalking Carp.  In so doing, I have observed in several different instances that accumulating noise is not nearly as frightening to Carp as a sudden noise from the same source and of the same volume.  For example, if I am motoring along with my small electric, I can literally go right over a feeding Carp before it will bolt.  If I start the motor up even 20 or 30 feet away, the sudden noise is enough to send the fish to deeper water.  If my buddy and I are talking as we approach a swim of tailing fish they aren’t as likely to spook as if we begin talking after we get there or after the fish get to us.  I know another Carp fly rodder who fishes from a larger boat and uses a gas motor to move from one area to another.  Again, the gradual accumulated noise isn’t nearly as bothersome to the fish as the sudden noise.  Just last summer he had his motor wide open.  Sadly, he hit a sunbathing Carp.  If he had been stopped within 60 feet of that same fish and then started the motor the fish would have run immediately.  Again, the Weberian apparatus makes Carp so alert and discerning.  I guess to achieve “World’s Greatest Sportfish” status a fish has to have some serious assets.  Indeed, Carp do.

At the end of 2006, as I do each year, I wrote out goals for myself covering several parts of my life.  Areas that I work on setting goals are: personal, professional, financial, spiritual, family, physical, and social Included of course were my fishing goals.  My fishing goals included among other things: new places to which I plan to go, numbers of fish I hope to catch, size of fish I hope to catch, number of days I plan to go fishing, people with whom I plan to fish, flies I intend to tie.  As I review my goals I realize that I need to ask myself what am planning to do to help myself achieve these goals. 

Based on the results of my piscatorial assessment I am seriously going to work at stalking fish more carefully.  Even if I don’t see a fish bolt that doesn’t mean I haven’t alerted or scared more than one with a careless movement or sound.  In fact I should assume that I have.  I realize from the tale above that I am probably scaring fish I never see.  I’m not just scaring them away I’m keeping them from coming anywhere near me since they hear me long before I see them.  This is a critical lesson for me and I need to adjust my tactics accordingly.  I made a list of things I need to stop doing.  In a huge way I need to avoid so many things like: the clippers dropping, the radio plopping, the anchor thumping, the boat bumping, me telling, my buddy yelling, my feet pounding, the motor sounding, my backcast splashing, the water thrashing, the boat bag sliding, the trout guys chiding, the gravel crunching, my sandwich munching, the floorboards creaking, and the boat seat squeaking.  All of that said, when stalking feeding Carp, this coming year I will do everything I can to minimize the noise I make, even if I enjoy making the noise. 

Epilogue:  My lovely wife of nearly three decades just finished reading this article.  She commented, “In social settings, in the car, at a movie, at the grocery store, shopping for furniture, and during the night when your wife is trying to sleep, none of these situations have ever got you to stop farting.  But now, finally, after 29 years, you’ll hold back for Carp fishing?  What does that tell you?  Hmmm…”